I am the youngest of a large Chinese family that was well provided for by my parents through the most difficult of times in a poor country. When I was born, after World War II during the baby boom, my family was enjoying a relative affluence only to lose it two years later with the Communist rebellion. During all those years of turmoil my father, who was from the old school, never gave up the philosophy that human nature was basically good. It simply needed higher education to develop a good conscience. This enabled him to live ethically and harmoniously with his fellow human beings. My mother was of a similar but more emphatic bent, considering the pursuit of knowledge as a means of self-improvement.
I went on to spend twenty-two years of my life pursuing education, and finally achieved a Ph.D. degree in the U.S. Nevertheless, when I accepted my diploma from the chancellor in May 1975, I was overwhelmed with a great sense of anticlimactic emptiness. I was asking myself, “Is this what my life is for?” For this new doctoral degree recipient, the highest attainment in education did not fill the void within.
It was not until two years later that I found the meaning of my human life. The circumstances that led to my regeneration began with the passing away of my father in April of 1977. A great many people attended my father’s funeral. Prior to the event, about fifty believers from the local church in Taipei gathered in the front room and prayed strongly. Although I was not saved and did not understand their accent, I was deeply impressed with something which testified that this group of people was not afraid of death. I also wanted that confidence. It was not until years after I was saved that I began to realize that this “something” was the all-inclusive life-giving Spirit.
In September of 1977 I left California for Richmond, Virginia to begin my first job. When I moved into my apartment I was faced with its blank walls and the return of that empty void which I had sensed at my commencement. It is only when a man comes to the end of his self-effort that the Lord can begin to grow His life in him. This was indeed my situation. As it happened, my brother had given me the book The Normal Christian Life by Watchman Nee a few months earlier, but I had not felt the need to read it. Now that I had moved to a place where I knew hardly anyone and did not have much else to do other than work, I began to read this book with the hope of finding something that would fill this void within. When I began to read the book I was captivated by Watchman Nee’s exposition of the divine life and its relevance to man. He used simple words to convey the relationship between God and man. Drawing from the book of Romans, He presented a man’s need for the blood of Christ without pontificating or implying condemnation. I then realized I had to identify with Christ on the cross in order for His blood to cleanse me of my sins. With tears flowing down, I got to my knees and received the Lord Jesus as my Savior. At that instant I felt a warm current enter my heart as if I was in the bosom of the Father. My sins were forgiven. My conscience was cleansed and ended its strife. Early the next morning when I went outside, I was greeted with trees that appeared greener than ever before. The colors of the flowers were vibrant with life. The birds sang with exuberance. I was happy that I had a life! The void within was filled. I had found Jesus, the meaning of my human life.
Subsequent to my salvation, I began to meet with the local church in Washington, D.C., to where I commuted from Richmond for two years. I was baptized in November 1977. I read all of the books by Watchman Nee that I could get my hands on. Then, I was happy to find out that Watchman Nee’s co-worker, Witness Lee, was ministering to the local churches through the Living Stream Ministry. In October of 1980, I moved from Richmond to Fullerton, California to begin an engineering career in the aerospace industry. I have been meeting with the seeking Christians in the local church in Fullerton ever since. I have received immense help from Witness Lee’s ministry in the last 22 years. Through his ministry my faith is strengthened, my spirit is supplied, my vision is clarified, and I can be built up with all those who call upon the name of the Lord out of a pure heart.
– P. K.